Your Words Matter

As teachers what we say and do matters. It matters greatly for the students that sit in our classes, walk our halls, eat in our cafeterias, have fun on our playgrounds, play on our teams, and participate in our clubs. Each student matters. Angela Maiers spoke about this idea a few years ago. 

No one can really argue with Angela's powerful message of making sure our students matter. We demonstrate our care for students and ensuring that they know they matter through our actions and our words. 

Our school is on a journey to increase feedback to students about their learning through goal setting. In addition, we are teaching our students to develop a growth mindset when they encounter something that is challenging. These approaches require us to think about how we are talking with our students and the message we are sending through our words. Do we really believe they can learn? Do we think they will make their goals? 

When I was in middle school  I received one of those weight lifting benches they sold at Service Merchandise for my birthday. The bench came with a barbell, weights, and at the end of the bench you could set it up to do leg extensions. I was so excited about this gift and being the smallest kid in school I imagined myself getting bigger and stronger. It wasn't long after I received this gift that someone told me that I could continue to lift weights but I wouldn't gain any muscle.  This was someone I trusted so I believed them. I stopped lifting weights and that gift collected dust in the garage. 

I believed this falsehood for a very long time. Those words from someone I trusted led me to believe that no matter how hard I tried I wouldn't gain any muscle from working out. Even though I read research to the contrary, the words this person spoke to me shaped my beliefs. Words matter. I started to work out regularly in my late 30s and I realized that I could gain muscle and get stronger. I finally let go of the comment that was made to me so many years prior.  I am guessing that my story is similar to yours in that you may believe something about yourself that isn't true because of what someone has said to you. Words matter, they shape our thoughts and beliefs. 

We all remember the saying sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me. The truth is words cut deep and wound us. The words others say to us can influence our thinking and what we believe about ourselves. The spoken words from others can build us up or tear us down. We can be the worst culprits in words that tear us down through negative self talk. We tell ourselves we can't, were not smart enough, we don't have the strength, or it is too hard. If we are saying those negative words to ourselves, than what are our students saying to themselves? What do they think? Do they believe they have shortcomings? Do they think they are not smart enough? Not creative enough?

The work being done by Carol Dweck about growth mindset, and Angela Duckworth on grit, is exciting and gives hope to the fact that we can change those beliefs  and thoughts that come from comments from others or from that negative self talk. When I walk into classrooms I get encouraged to see teachers talking with students about these concepts. 

Let's remember the power we have with our words. Let's use our words to build up our students so that they believe in themselves. This is one of the greatest things we can do for our students!