Before I write write my #Oneword2018 I wanted to reflect on 2017. Without a doubt this has been the most challenging year in my life. As I have shared in previous posts my wife was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in February of this year. The pain was so raw in the beginning it was a challenge just to make it through the day without overwhelming fear and crushing anxiety. A nine hour surgery was followed by multiple rounds of intensive chemotherapy. The chemotherapy was delivered directly into her abdomen and she was admitted to the hospital for three days for each round. I felt helpless as I watched her get filled with poison in order to kill the cancer.
While most of our friends and family enjoyed their summers and took much needed vacations we were making trips back and forth to the hospital. The weeks between treatment left Jenna in tremendous abdominal pain and wiped her out to the point she needed multiple blood transfusions. I tried to make the best of the summer with our two beautiful daughters. One of our goals was to find the best burger near our home (side note - I love a good burger). We did find two places that have great burgers.
The summer faded quickly and the school year started. The intensity of the start of the year paired with Jenna finishing treatment left us both feeling drained. As we tried to settle into the routine of school year we received great news. Jenna's CT scan after treatment showed that she was NED (No evidence of disease). We celebrated in early October with our first date in months.
With all of the uncertainty, sadness, fear, anger, and anxiousness that filled 2017 there was also love, beauty, kindness, and friendship. The outpouring of support was absolutely amazing. We are so blessed in that regard. I don't think we could have made it through the first few days and weeks without that support. I have often heard the following verse - "The Lord goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you or forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8. I suppose I never had to really put much thought into that verse because my life was fairly easy. I mean we had challenges and things came up, but nothing that turned our world upside down. My faith continues to be tested and I have to believe that God won't leave us.
With all of my focus on Jenna and our girls I had a very difficult time being at my best as a principal. One of the things that is really important to me is developing and maintaining a great culture where teachers and students feel comfortable to take risks. When Jenna was going through her treatment I was missing work and I wasn't able to spend time in classrooms, build relationships, and celebrate risk taking.
The last couple of months I started to feel more like myself and I feel more connected with what we are doing at our school. I am super proud of our teachers who have adopted the use of morning meetings to connect with their students and build classroom community. Our students started to share their stories and the great things that are happening at our school through a weekly podcast. You can follow them on iTunes.
Here is one of my favorite episodes - AGS News Episode 6
We also have students talking about the books they enjoyed through book talks that we share with our school community.
As the years come to a close I am thankful that Jenna is doing much better. I am hopeful that we can continue to build an awesome school culture and I am comforted knowing that God is always with us.
Thanks for sharing such personal challenges. I’m thrilled your wife is feeling better. I hope everyone who reads this post, not only gains perspective but takes time to appreciate family, work, Love, and gratitude.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your story, Tim. You show vulnerability as well as quiet strength, both of which we need more of. You are an inspiration to me and many.
ReplyDeleteBest,
Jennifer
Tim, your words struck such a chord with me as I stand on the sidelines of so many who are walking this journey with their loved ones. It’s difficult to push the pause button on various aspects of our lives while we tend to matters of survival; however, your strength and vulnerability remind us we are never truly alone when faced with trials and tribulations. Thank you for sharing Jenna’s story with the world so we can celebrate the joyful moments and lend support when you may need it most. Love all the ways you have shined positivity with your PLN, your staff, your students, and community!
ReplyDeleteTim...this post was so on time for me. Your raw and honest blog that I'm honored you shared with inspired me to start blogging again...I'll be posting on New Years Day. You're a gift to our PLN...I'm blessed to know you. I will keep your beautiful family is in my thoughts and prayers. 2018 will be a great year for you!
ReplyDeleteThank you, thank you for sharing. It is refreshing to read your honesty and vulnerability. I have to believe that your community saw the way you loved your family and that it made an impact - perhaps different than if you had been able to spend more time at school, but maybe even more important. Glad to hear that the chemo worked, and sending prayers as you and your family continue to refill from the intensity of the past year!
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