Try, try, try again.

Here is the third and final part of a three part series exploring the connection between failure, vulnerability, and the importance of iteration. The previous parts were focused on the importance of learning from failure and how vulnerability is a strength.

Part One - Failure

Part Two - Vulnerability is May Strength

Part Three - Try, Try, Try Again

With choosing to be vulnerable we open ourselves up for risk taking and hopefully greater success. We also open up ourselves for things not working out as we would hope and not meeting our goal or failing to succeed with an initiative. Carol Dweck shares that "failure can be painful experiences. But it doesn't define you." Being vulnerable and failure are both key components in learning and growth. Yet, we often shy away from being open to learning from failure. 

My daughter, Caitlin, gave me the video game Injustice: Gods Among Us for Christmas and we played the game over winter break. As I continued to get beat by Caitlin I realized that the only way to get better was to try, try, try again. I am not a gamer and I don't play video games often enough to have an innate understanding of how to use the controller. I needed several iterations and tutorials to have some understanding of how to use multiple buttons in the right sequence in order for my superhero character to do special moves. Video games are designed and played by gamers, or in my case a novice, with the understanding that the player will fail multiple times in order to understand how to ultimately win the game. 

Prior to break I visited a fourth grade classroom where students were exploring "energy" The students were working in groups to try and create different ways to get a marble to end up in a cup. In talking with the students and observing their progress it was obvious that students were not afraid to try a method, fail, try another method, fail, and this continued until they were successful. Failing was a huge part of the learning that was happening.

In Simon Sinek's book, Start With Why, he shares about the Wright brothers and how they would take five sets of spare parts each time they attempted to fly their plane because they knew that is how many trials they would attempt for the day. They started each day knowing they would fail, but also learn through that process, until ultimately they were successful with the first flight. 

One of my favorite videos for inspiration is of Heather Dorniden running the 600 meter race at the 2008 Big Ten Indoor Championship. The runners complete three laps and she falls heading into the last lap.

In an interview Heather talked about finishing the race. "The last 50 meters, I hit a gear that I never knew I had." If she had not had learned perseverance and the importance of learning from past failures she would never have reached her potential.

In order to be our best we must be vulnerable to take risks where we may fail, but those failures become lessons in which we learn to get back up and try again.

Grateful

As I have reflected on the past year and began to think about my #oneword2018 I was contemplating a handful of words. There is no doubt that 2017 was a challenging year and to be completely honest I was beginning to harbor some anger and frustration. Jenna's diagnosis and treatment was our main focus for most of the year and we missed out on many things this past year and our lives will forever be changed. It is easy to become bitter or angry with the fact that we missed out on a year long planned vacation with friends, that we couldn't celebrate our anniversary in the crazy creative ways we have had in the past, and we didn't enjoy the quiet summer evenings on the patio.

In 2018 I want to be grateful at home, at school, and in life. I know that this will take intentional practice and letting go of the things that I cannot control. It starts with making a list of the things in my life that I am grateful for and realizing how blessed I am.

Here is a start.


Home

Jenna - I am married to my best friend. She has been my rock, inspiration, confidant, she continues to offer an enourmous amount of encouragement, and is the love of my life.

Aleigh - She is a tremendous student, gifted artist, soon to be driver, and a sensitive, caring, thoughtful young lady.

Caitlin - Crazy smart, quietly competitive, confident, almost teenager, compassionate, and a Star Wars and DC Comic loving kid.

I am grateful that I have three wonderful girls that bring love, joy, and laughter to my life.

School

Everyday that I come to work I get the opportunity to interact with our students and know that in some small way I am making a difference. I have the privilege of leading dedicated, caring teachers who truly enjoy what they do. I am grateful that I work in an excellent school district that is in a great community.

Life

As we have been busy decluttering our crawl space I came across two photographs that brought back memories. The first was a picture of myself and others from a mission trip I took to the Czech Republic where we taught English to high school students. It made me think of all the other mission trips I took and the summers I spent volunteering as a camp counselor at Silver Birch Ranch in Wisconsin. I am grateful for these experiences as they provided the foundation for my passion of making a difference in the lives of students.

The second was a picture of my grandfather and me standing by my car in Arizona after I graduated from college. He, along with my grandmother, drove across the country to see me graduate. He celebrated the accomplishments of his grand kids and he was so proud of all of us. I am grateful that he showed me the importance of family and celebration.

As I wrote this post I am reminded that we all have struggles and situations in our lives that are challenging. Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% how you react - John Maxwell. I choose to be grateful.